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Until Death Do Us Part: Losing a Spouse   Three to Six months After Loss

Adam Striffler • June 12, 2024

By now most of the big stuff is probably done. The thank you notes have been written and mailed. The marker or head stone has been placed or you’ve found a place for the urn. You’ve probably filed for the life insurance, and perhaps you’ve even begun to clean out his closet.    

  

You may be wondering, what have I missed?  

  

  • Have you changed the titles to the car?  
  • Put the deed to the home in your name?  
  • Have you changed the utilities and cable service into your name?  
  • Is your medical power of attorney up to date?  
  • Have you updated your estate plan or will?  
  • Have you spoken to an accountant or tax expert about any tax consequences associated with gifts you have made or increased allocations from IRA or investments?  

  

How about you? What are you doing to take care of you?  

  

  • Are you up-to-date with your health and dental care?  
  • Are you eating well?  
  • Are you learning to cook or have you gotten someone to mow the lawn?  
  • Have you had lunch or dinner with a friend?  
  • Have you done something fun? A movie? Golf? A ballgame?  

  

Scientists tell us there is a hand/mind connection. Doing things with our hands actually increases our sense of well-being. Even simple chores such as washing the dishes, preparing your meal, or even making your bed help to provide purpose and a natural routine. Why not step outside of your box and try something creative that you used to enjoy doing or have thought about trying? Don’t discount the value of a craft, woodworking or art project.  

  

Finally, see people. Human contact is vital to your new normal. If your friends and family aren’t calling you, then call them. Look for a movie you would like to see, a museum you would like to visit, or a restaurant you would like to try and ask someone to join you.     

 

www.strifflerfuneralhomes.com

Jewish Funeral Traditions

By Adam Striffler • June 20, 2024
As we begin to learn more about religious practices outside of our own, it is sometimes surprising to find how much different faiths have in common. Mourners of all faiths understand the power of grief and the comfort of community. So, what happens when a person of the Jewish faith dies, and how can a person outside that faith support a friend or neighbor who is grieving?

Writing the Thank You Notes

By Adam Striffler • June 12, 2024
Writing thank you notes is usually one of the very first “after the funeral” tasks you will undertake. You may be surprised to find that your brain/hand coordination is not working so well. You sit there with pen in hand and well-formed thoughts in your head, but somehow it all gets lost between the head and the paper.

Dad Died. What Do I Do with the Pills?

By Adam Striffler • June 12, 2024
Prescription medication is expensive. Just that fact can be an understandable motivation for some risky business. When my father died, my mother was asking everyone, “Aren’t you on blood pressure medicine?  You take this heart pill don’t you?  What do you take for depression?” Her plan, no waste.

Mother Died… How Long Do We Keep Her Things?

By Adam Striffler • June 12, 2024
Separating from a loved one’s belongings is one of the more difficult jobs you will have to do after a death. It is amazing how much is collected over a lifetime. You probably won’t get it done in a day and you will probably shed a few tears.

What To Look for When You Are Buying Final Expense Insurance

By Adam Striffler • June 12, 2024
Cost is important, but it’s not the whole story. Take a look at the premium, the amount you will pay each month, how long will you pay that amount?

Too Little Too Late  - A Memorial Gone Wrong

By Adam Striffler • June 12, 2024
Jane knew some people had a fear of planning a service. They don’t know how to or what to plan. They are at a loss. They should have they called the local funeral home for help. The funeral director could have helped them find someone to pull together a brief ceremony at the graveside or in the chapel.

Grief Is Individual

By Adam Striffler • June 12, 2024
Let’s talk about the stages of grief. There is denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. I studied them in nursing school, reviewed them when I got divorced and generally found them to be a pretty accurate and helpful bit of knowledge. And then, a family member died. Stages?

What is a Celebration of Life?

By Adam Striffler • June 9, 2024
The celebration of life is the personal or individual aspect of a funeral service. It is about the person who died. It is about their relationships, their loves, their passions, their accomplishments, their beliefs, their talents. It is about what and who they cared about as they lived their own unique life. How did they make a difference?

Preplanning Your Funeral in your 60’s

By Adam Striffler • May 24, 2024
According to a National Funeral Directors Association survey, more than half (62.5%) of us expect to participate in making our own funeral arrangements. And yet, less than a quarter of us have actually acted on that impulse. Not really so surprising since making funeral arrangements can literally be the very last thing we do. We can put it off right up to the end!

Cremation or Burial… is That the Question?

By Adam Striffler • May 10, 2024
When a family member dies or when a person is planning their own funeral in advance, one of the first questions that will be asked is, “Do you want burial or cremation?” The burial or cremation question is a starting point for a number of choices that must be made. It’s a place to start. But it is absolutely not the entire story.
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